Cheating is a tough subject... There are many ways to be intimate with someone, but are all ways equal? What about when you're married? Is one type of cheating worse than the other? And, what exactly constitutes cheating?
Craig & Angela Bickford share their thoughts in this week's He Said/She Said blog.
My feelings about cheating are complicated... I almost feel that for my spouse to be emotionally involved with someone would be worse than if he had a one-night stand with the person. That being said, for my relationship, I would say anytime he takes the thoughts and decides to act on them, whether it be emotional, physical, or even 'friendly' in nature, that it would be cheating. Even just accepting an invitation to lunch with a woman he's had thoughts about would be dangerous territory in my eyes, because then the opportunity is present to act on the thoughts. There was a situation where he was in contact with a former classmate that he admittedly had feelings for 'back then', and that made me a little jealous. He encouraged me to get to know her, so I did - and wouldn't you know it - we talk now more than they do! I think the best way to avoid this situation is to be open and honest about who you are in contact with. Know each other's friends, always be honest about where you're going and who you're seeing, etc. For me, I don't spend time with any man other than my husband unless he knows, and that makes me feel more comfortable too. Now, if it happened, would I forgive him? I'd like to think yes, just because of the nature of my faith and the fact that I don't believe that divorce is an option for me; however, this is one of those situations that I can't really say what I'd do until it happened (and it won't, right honey?)...
Cheating to me in not complicated at all... If you have a physical relationship with anyone other than your spouse, that is cheating. Flirting, befriending, having personal conversations with opposite sex co-workers, etc. are all things that can be dangerous, and I can see how some people would consider them as cheating, but that is not my personal definition. I think mistakes are made when people get caught up in an outside relationship and it develops into cheating because they aren't working on the relationship they are in at home. I know for myself that I put personal boundaries up when I am interacting with women who are not my wife. It is a personal choice that I am making to stay faithful and it helps me not have other thoughts even enter my mind. And you are correct babe, you don't have to ever worry about it happening - if I can't find what I am looking for in the one that was chosen for my by my God, then it was not meant for me to have.
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